We all want to live a life of luxury, right? We don’t turn on the television (or YouTube) to watch people struggling in poverty.
No, we want to envision ourselves walking down Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills with bags full of expensive clothes. We cruise the strip in our luxury two-door convertible coupe. How exciting.
How many of our lives reflect this lifestyle in reality? I know mine does not, and I am more than okay with it. Most of us will need to make peace with not having this lifestyle, maybe ever. But is that such a bad thing?
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Growing up poor in a prosperous city. I grew up in San Diego, California—known for the best weather in the world. However, I wasn’t living the luxurious life; I lived the exact opposite.
I left San Diego at age 18 (in 1999) and joined the military. Now, after 24 years, I am back in San Diego for my final tour of duty. Will I retire in San Diego? Hell no!
I have a wonderful life in Pensacola, Florida. A life I could not come close to affording here in San Diego. I’d rather have a comfortable lifestyle than chase a Rodeo Drive fantasy.
But how do YOU know if your city is too expensive for you? What signs will you have to shift your mindset to the midwest or southern lifestyle? Let’s take a look together.
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1) You feel that everyone has more money than you. When you live in an expensive metropolitan city, everyone ELSE looks rich. Are they rich?
Most people will make a lot of money in the city; however, all that matters is what’s in their emergency fund, 401K, and dividend portfolio.
If you start becoming depressed or losing self-confidence, it may be time for a change of scenery. Going to a smaller city converts the BMWs and Teslas into Toyotas and Mazdas. It’s good to fit in with the crowd sometimes.
2) You cringe every time you go to the supermarket. There is a massive price difference between big and small cities. I feel the difference every time I go to Walmart in Pensacola and San Diego.
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If you start to get anxious when shopping, you could be falling behind. Once you start struggling financially, that’s when the pain begins.
In 2008, our house was underwater financially. Things were tight. When we needed credit the most, they ripped the rug from under our feet.
Now, when we have no debt and significant savings, everyone wants to offer us lines of credit. This is how the world works. If you are falling behind because of shopping and gas, look toward another city.
3) You’re jealous of people in other places. You may not meet many people from different places, but you watch House Hunters on HGTV, right?
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You may get jealous when you see people buying a mansion for $500,000, and you cannot get a one-bedroom for that amount.
It’s okay; be honest with yourself. Many people say their salaries are higher in the city, which may be true (on paper). However, living in a small town is cheaper as a percentage of your salary.
Plus, with remote work, you may command a higher “city” salary while living in Alabama or Mississippi.
4) Doing taxes makes you cry. Big cities charge hefty taxes. California and New York are two of the highest-taxed states in America. You will pay the price to live in luxury.
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On the other hand, Florida and Texas have no state taxes. This may not seem like a big deal when you are younger, but it will become one.
As you accumulate family members and assets, you’ll want to reduce your tax burden as much as possible. Some states reduce taxes on military retirement and so forth. Start doing the math on how much money you are actually taking home.
5) You can’t afford a house. Can you afford a home? Will your kid be able to afford a place in your city when they turn 30?
In San Diego, you probably need $900,000 to get a lovely three-bedroom, three-bathroom in an upper-class suburb. How much will this exact house cost in 20 years?
It’s good when you own the home, but what about your kids? Will they be able to buy a house near you someday? Investors love buying properties in big cities because there is always demand.
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If you are an insider, think about your children’s lives. I see so many older people in San Diego with no adult children around them. Why? The kids had to move to Arkansas to afford their lifestyle.
Is moving worth it? If this article strikes a nerve, what should you do about it? I’m not telling you to move, but you should start doing the math.
The best thing I have ever done is leave San Diego. I wouldn’t own three homes if I kept this “San Diego-only” mindset.
I also couldn’t retire at age 42 with $10,000/month in passive income. My retired military buddies who stayed in San Diego will work another 20+ years and never get ahead.
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Big cities require big mindsets. Above all comes the attitude of living in an expensive city. Do you want to live in San Diego and drive a Toyota?
No, most people want a big lifestyle. That means private schools, expensive trips, fancy cars, and large homes. You will need at least a $300,000/year salary to live this life in a big city.
Companies don’t just give away $300,000; they require massive workloads for this type of money. Is that the life you want to live for 30+ years?
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Conclusion. It all comes down to your happiness. Will you be content with always wanting more? I have seen more depressed people in San Diego than I can count.
Most of these people would be much happier in Pensacola with me. However, the “fantasy” of living in San Diego is much brighter than the “reality.”
For many people here, their greatest accomplishment is retiring in San Diego. However, they sacrifice a lifetime away from their children because the kids can’t afford to build a life nearby.
I want it all. I want to have a big family, see my grandkids daily, and run a homeschool. I cannot do that in San Diego, but I can build a kingdom in Pensacola. What is your dream lifestyle?
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