It seems that everyone nowadays wants to be independent. No, I am not talking about financial independence; I am talking about living alone, climbing the corporate ladder, and screaming from the top, “I made it by myself!”
Ouch, what is the total price we pay when we go through life alone, without a soulmate or partner? This is the first generation (last 15-20 years) where the media glorifies the single businessman and the single businesswoman.
The idea from this article came after I watched a movie on Netflix titled “Fatherhood.” Kevin Hart plays a single parent, and throughout the film, both of his mothers try to get him to move to his hometown so they can assist him. Nope, he chooses to remain far away from help and keeps stating his daughter and him are all alone. Garbage.
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Somehow I get the impression that he feels it is a badge of honor to say he did it independently. But, what are the costs to his daughter growing up without female representation? The narrative from the media is that you are weak if you ask for help. Garbage.
I used to feel like only weak people asked for help⏤it’s a poor people thing. The parents do not have a lot to offer, so they tell the children that they have to make it independently. Yep, I believed that for far too many years.
And guess what, I made it on my own. I bought my first car (at 18% interest) by myself and bought my first house (almost bankrupted us) by myself. What did I learn? That I could have done things better with help, mentorship, and guidance.
I changed my mind about weakness when I started reading about rich people. Rich people do not throw their children to the corporate wolves; poor people do. What is the cost of trying to grow yourself in America alone? Usually adverse effects on mental health.
You see, in America, we sell two narratives to the masses. However, only one of them is on TV. The other is in the shadows, but it peaks its head out when times get hard.
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Narrative #1 is that everyone can have it all by themselves. Hollywood shows that single mothers can be CEOs of their own business, work great hours, afford a full-time nanny, have a nice car, huge house, and have time to cook, clean, and date. She never seems stressed out or broke. The kids are all well adjusted, and nothing is out of place. In fact, the mother is also the head of the PTA. She doesn’t need anyone to help her.
Narrative #2 is the underpinnings of mental health and medication. The news always tells you to seek mental help and remedies. When life gets hard, it is okay to take a mental health break. Never work a job that stresses you out or causes anxiety. You deserve to be happy at work and home, and anyone or anything that changes that needs to go away.
These two narratives are at odds with one another. It is challenging to be a CEO of your own business without feeling any stress. I have been in the US Marine Corps for 22 years, and I know a little about mental health and stress. I can tell you that what they show on TV and in Movies is very dangerous to susceptible minds.
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I mainly see media selling the independence narrative to women. If a woman wants to get married, they tell her she is weak and needy. I feel sorry for women who buy into this crap. To connect with others is why we exist. We are supposed to grow old together.
I have achieved much in my 22-year career, including reaching the top of the enlisted ladder. However, my experience with my wife and kids is the pinnacle of my achievements and the highlight of my life.
I started dividend investing, buying properties, reading books, and writing articles to build a massive sum of passive income. I need passive income to live the life I want to live with my wife and kids. I want to achieve financial independence so my wife, kids, and grandkids can spend as much time together as possible.
Back to the “Fatherhood” movie, Kevin Hart remains in his town because he thinks like a poor person. To me, after studying the creation of money, I would have left my town, rented my home, and moved in with my mothers. Then, I would start a consulting business, a YouTube channel about being a single father, and other small businesses that I could automate, like a rental car business.
America has trained us to believe that our jobs are the end all be all in our lives. Forget that nonsense. We need strong family units. With a family team, we can achieve anything we want and keep our sanity. Why can’t adult children live with their parents?
Let’s convert the narrative into our favor and fight the corporations making large sums of cash from us living separate lives. Think about who wins in a divorce situation. The parents now need independent housing, toys, televisions, furniture, plane tickets, utilities, etc.
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Think about when a family of five all go their separate ways. The parents have a house, and the three kids each have their own homes. They travel for Christmas and buy individual cars. Then if the kids get divorced, we have even more homes and travel in the mix.
What if the family of five built a ten-bedroom, ten-bathroom home in a small city? Look at this beauty in Meridian, Mississippi. The cost, $895,000, would buy you something tiny in California. If the parents and three kids lived here together, they would split the costs four ways. That is roughly $1,200/month each.
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If that is how much we pay for housing, how much would we need to make as a family unit? We could all pretty live off $50,000-$60,000 a couple. No need to become the CEO⏤we would just need to focus on being happy and content. How’s that for mental health?
Conclusion. I used to think like the movie and believe that a man has to do everything alone. No, a man needs to make thoughtful decisions that involve long-term success. His ego comes secondary to the mission. If one of his friends laughs at him for living at home, they are not his friends.
Similarly, if a woman’s friend tells her not to get married or that marriage is for weak women, she needs to re-evaluate her friendships. Every happily married couple wants to assist others in finding this happiness.
There is nothing like being married, being happy, enjoying time together, and being rich. I have it all, and I want to get my kids and their spouses involved (when they grow past 14 and 10). I want to introduce my kids and kids-in-law to Stress Freedom. There is no need for them to suffer the perils of the corporate world—when my wife and I have already been through that. Why pass stress and worry when we can pass wealth and happiness?
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Disclosure: I am not a financial advisor or money manager, and any knowledge is given as guidance and not direct actionable investment advice. I am an Amazon Affiliate. Please research any investment vehicles that are being considered. I wrote this article myself, and it expresses my own opinions. I am not receiving compensation for it. I have no business relationship with any company whose stock is mentioned in this article.
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