Many of our single friends wonder how Kris and I got lucky enough to find each other. Yes, that night we were lucky to be in the same place at the same time. However, after 16 years, it is anything but luck that has kept us together. It is love, hard work, and commitment. Commitment to each other, but also the commitment to the entire family ecosystem.
Kris and I sometimes go to the back porch and ask ourselves,” Is it really that hard to find that special someone?”. In our first article, we said that Core Values were the foundation of forming a successful relationship. Next is family values.
We started to look at successfully married couples over the years. Then we noticed a trend. The couples that thrived together all had amazing family values. When I say family, I mean the immediate family (spouse, kids), parents, siblings, extended family, in-laws, friends, and co-workers. These amazing couples are always surrounded by loved ones.
One of my silent mentors was my Sergeant Major when I was half-way through my career. He and his wife were a perfect couple. They were both humble, quiet, and great listeners. He was always the senior person in the room, yet you would have never known it by the way he carried himself. Now that he is retired, I have the honor of following him on Facebook. He and his wife are ALWAYS out doing things with family. His son has 3 kids (so his grandkids). The son and daughter-in-law travel the world with Sergeant Major. The son also does rodeo, and Sergeant Major is always there with him. His other son is dating someone and Sergeant Major is going to ballgames with the young couple. Sergeant Majors’ parents are living with him. Every time I see a post from him I say,” Man he has it all figured out”. Family.
All this to say, as you meet new people, see how these people interact with other people. Listen to the way they talk about parents and siblings. Ask them if they would take care of their parents as their parents grow older. These are very important questions. How they treat others is how they will treat you. Also, ensure that you are working to repair damaged relationships with family. I understand that sometimes our families are far away, but we need to make a concerted effort to close these distances. We were created to belong in a tribe (“it takes a town”). The bigger the tribe, the less chance that we will fail. Find people who have large tribes and that will also make your tribe bigger.
Disclosure: I am not a financial advisor or money manager, and any knowledge is given as guidance and not direct actionable investment advice. I wrote this article myself, and it expresses my own opinions. I am not receiving compensation for it. I have no business relationship with any company whose stock is mentioned in this article.
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